Friday, October 04, 2013

Dr. Charles Stanley, Just the Fax, and Enjoy

Dr. Charles Stanley - Charles Frazier Stanley (born September 25, 1932) is the senior pastor of First Baptist Church, a megachurch in northern Atlanta, Georgia. He is the founder and president of In Touch Ministries. Stanley also served two one-year terms as president of the Southern Baptist Convention from 1984 to 1986. Stanley has an evangelical, fundamentalist, dispensationalist theology.

Last evening, Laura and her friend, Donna, attended a book signing for Stanley's new book, Emotions: Confront the Lies. Conquer with Truth at the Family Christian Store in Sacramento, CA.

Here are some of the photographs Laura took at this event:

Visit Dr. Charles Stanley's Web site: In Touch Ministries

Just the Fax - Yesterday, as I relaxed and luxuriated in the tranquility that enveloped mine office—following a grueling day of IT, Web design, and photography—my reverie was unduly shattered by the entrance of a group of four females. They slithered into mine office sans appointment, and the apparent leader of the pack (as it were) stridently pronounced, "I need you to Fax this stuff right away." She held several sheets of paper in her right hand and fanned the air with them.

I grasped the remote control for my Roku unit and paused the episode of "I (Almost) Got Away with It" I had been watching on Netflix and replied, "I recall when faxing was done routinely, but that was many years ago." I created the similitude of a clock hand with my right arm and—while rotating it counter-clockwise—said, "Turning back the hands of time: Back, back, back. Fax (short for facsimile), sometimes called telecopying or telefax, is the telephonic transmission of scanned printed material (both text and images), normally to a telephone number connected to a printer or other output device."

The creature who had addressed me said nothing. I continued, "I have not personally been an active participant in the sending or receiving of a fax in many years. I have neither the capability nor the desire to engage in such an antiquated methodology of communication."

She stared at me, her jaw became set, her eyes became glazed and unblinking, and drool began to fall from her lower lip and puddle on her shoes.

"Well, you gotta send this 'cause it was s'posed to be done like yesterday or whatever."

I replied, "If you will excuse me, I must return to my viewing pleasure. Please exit the building now, and have a nice day." Her voice reached a feverish pitch—approximating the sound of a wounded ewe—and she said, "Just send the [expletive redacted] fax."

I said, "Go now." I pressed the Roku pause button, "I (Almost) Got Away with It" began, I grasped the remote control for my Onkyo home theatre receiver, and increased the volume sufficiently to make it impossible for her to speak and imagine that I would hear what she said.

The group departed, I lowered the volume, and enjoyed the balance of the episode.

Enjoy - Relax and enjoy these images and videos!